Crossfit Cheater, That's Me

First off I'd like to apologize to Ikaika for calling him a cheater. He's the real deal.

I'm the cheater.

Yesterday as we did our WOD I totally did not do 10 reps for all four rounds. I know I did 10 for the first round, then 8 for the second, six for the third and 8 again for the last round.

I just couldn't do it. By all rights my pushup count should have been zilch.

Today we are supposed to run 400 meters then do 50 KB swings then run another 400 meters.

Today I will not sacrifice weight for reps.

Although I will likely pick up the 53 lbs kettlebell, just to try it out. If  I can't do it I'll switch to the 44 pound kettlebell.

I promise. No more cheating. Besides, I'm only cheating myself.

Sunday blogging, Friday drinking and a buncha old pictures

It's Sunday and there's no workout but I've got to blog.

For one thing I've got way too many pictures on my home computer that I need to finally make public. Nothing embarrassing just stuff that I've had for a while. Old stuff from the other gym, etc.

Plus I've been trying to incorporate more than two pictures as part of the overall look of my website but it ain't happenen. Not that I know what I'm doing but I think I'll have to change the overall design and that will just eff things up. Took me 20 minutes just to figure out how to change the color of the "I Hate Cardio" title of the blog. Sigh.

So let's show some pictures. Funny comments may or may not follow:

Hey look, it's Bob. Bob trains like a madman and we all like to give him a hard time but it's sort of like kicking puppies because he just smiles and takes it. So I'll just say that this pic is a good exmpale of the kind of work he puts into the gym. Hundred percent sweat and no B.S.

This one I want to apologize ahead of time if I'm wrong but is that Carol? Because if it is she sure as hell doesn't look like that anymore. If it's not please feel free to come up and slap me in the face but if that IS Carol then she is literally a fraction of the woman she used to be. Unreal kine work ethic on her too and it's obviously showing. (Please I hope I'm not wrong.)

 Oh look, it's a fat guy with pale white legs stretching his fat ass on the floor of the gym. I hate this pic.

Whether you call her Kehau, Tehau or whatever she's one strong wahine. This must have been a whlie back because I can see her husband Frank working out in the background. For the newbie Frank is too far advanced in his fitness to work out with mere mortals. I hear nowadays he does a Mr. Incredible workout benching trains and stuff. And if you haven't seen the Incredibles go rent it just so you get that reference.

One of Bump's more mental workouts. Actually the worst part about this (for me) was just scratching my knees on the asphalt. What? I dislike pain. I hate lunges too but whatever.

The end. Nuff said.

Actually another reason I posted these pics is because for the first time I can actually see what some of these pics are. For the longest time they were unidentifiable until someone taught me I can type in ".jpg" after the image title and it'll show up. Yes indeedy, he can be taught some new tricks.

And while I'm at it I might as well post some new pics. Here's the latest from the RFM karaoke night out at Ohana's on Lower Main.

I know this is a tiny image but I'd like to add some captions. Ever make up captions for a picture? I'll give you some examples of why it's fun:

Val: "Look at my calf muscle biotch!"

Patti: "Hey Rikki, do you read Korean?"

Rikki: "Hey Patti, shut up and look cute, like I'm doing."

See? Fun for the whole family. Let's try another one.

Why don't I let you folks try some. I'll be watching for them in the comments section of this blog post. Enjoy.

See ya Monday,

Rod

Ikaika the cheater and clarifying comments to Kehau, Maui's Strongest Samoan Woman

Here at Crossfit RFM if you hang out long enough you'll start to figure out who you should partner up with based upon similar strength/speed/conditioning etc. Like I would never partner up with Lori, Kehau or Derek. Those three are too much. I. No. Can. Handle.

But Kats and I are around the same level. Some things he does better than I do, and some I do better.

And now there's a new guy, Ikaika, who I THOUGHT might be at the same level as Kats and I. He's in the 200 pound weight class just like we are and he ACTS like one of us.

But he's not. He's a cheater.

Ikaika totally sandbags on weight. Today we did these heaving hang snatch balance things with the dumbell (no I will not explain what those are) and by all rights Kats, Ikaika and I were all supposed to use about 50 pound dumbells. Except those would really really REALLY suck.

Instead Ikaika grabs a 40 pound dumbell which Kats and I are still dubious about. So what do we do? We grab 40 pound dumbells too because we figure we're all at the same level.

Not.

So the workout is 5 snatches per arm, 10 pushups and a 200 meter run, AMRAP for 10 minutes. We start and Ikaika takes off. His 40 pound dumbell goes up and down effortlessly. Meanwhile Kats and I are struggling. My back starts to hurt and Ikaika runs off laughing after his pushups.

I try to chase after him but as you know by now, running is not my strong suit. Also my back is starting to tighten up and I Hate Cardio. (Just in case you missed the title of my blog.)

So Ikaika and Derek both finish six rounds which means he is part of the ELITE athletes that train at our gym. Bastard.

That's okay, Kats and I stand alone as the intermediate level guys at the gym. And Bob. Can't forget about Bob.

I'm sorry Ikaika but you are banned from working out with the intermediates. Go train with Derek and Luke, aka "Mr. Smooth." And go use those 50 pound weights like you were supposed to and leave the 40 pounders to me and Kats.

On another note, I said Kehau was an elitist because she wrote about things that I cannot relate to on her blog. I must clarify. Kehau is not an elitist. The other people who read her blog are. Crotch pot cooking and producing your own beef stock out of thin air are things that I cannot do and thus I feel unworthy to comment upon. Kehau is very much a regular person like the rest of us, except that she can push cars with her bare hands. I'm not kidding, check out this photo:

That's a damn Hyundai sedan people. One HYUNDAI. She pushed it 50 feet and the parking brake was on and there were four fat guys sitting inside. Other than that she's a normal chick though. Plus her blog rocks.

Okay, take care. I might have to go to a work thing tomorrow evening which will suck because I'll miss being humiliated at the gym. Ah well, duty calls.

Later,

Rod

Push it

I hurt today, in a good way. In a way that I haven't hurt in a long time.

I actually pushed my body today and it felt good. Except for the part where I couldn't feel my hands.

Today started off brutally, with Kehau's warmups from the Underworld.

Inch worms and crab walks and bear crawls and a whole bunch of other crap that I really don't want to explain because it would involve more typing, which would anger my hands.

(Are you sensing this is going to be a short blog post? You soothsayer you.)

Anyway, you know the workout is going to be something special when the warm up about does you in.

Then we do weighted pullups and situps. I am sweating truckloads at this point.

Then it's time for the actual workout, 21, 15 and 9 reps of dumbell trusters and pullups. I go for the 35 lbs dumbells because Ikaika did the same earlier that day and because I'm stupid.

The first 21 thrusters are tiring but I stick with the pack. Then the pullups come and I try to crank out as many as I can before exhaustion. I think I do 10 before resting. Not only am I sweating but I'm out of breath.

I finish the 21 and hit the 15 thrusters which I knew at this point would be the worst set. The middle sets always are. You don't have the strength of the first set and you're too scared to go all out because the last set is coming up. I try but it's brutal.

I finally make it through and hit the pullups and head straight for the red rubber bands. This is an indication of how bad it is as I can't recall the last time I needed to do assisted pullups. It's still tough as hell but now it's time for thrusters again.

This time I manage to power through thanks to Derek who was yelling at me. Then I hit the pullups and I hear him say "forget the rubber bands." I have an out of body experience as the geek in me recalls Obi Wan telling Luke to "use the Force" and then Luke puts away his targeting gear. For some reason I listen to Derek and do not use the rubber band.

He says do 3 and I do 3. He lets me rest for what felt like a second and says do three more, and I do three more. He pushes and I do the last three then drop. It's over.

I'm out of breath but the worst part is my hands are shaking. My grip is totally destroyed. I can't hold on to my notebook to write my time and the thought of gripping my steering wheel to drive home is out of the question. I feel like I need air and so I lie down outside hoping to catch a breeze. Meanwhile I try to get some feelings back in my hands. It takes about 10 minutes.

Holy damn that was a good workout. Much mahalo to Brother D for helping me push, I seriously couldn't have done it without him.

Here's hoping I don't have to grip anything during tomorrow's workout, otherwise I'm screwed.

Later,

Rod

A Fight Gone Bad, the coach asks me for help and why I don't comment on Kehau's blog

Today was a Saturday and while I don't usually don't do the Saturday workout today was a Fight Gone Bad.

FGB: the aftermath

Aptly named by BJ Penn it's a nonstop, five station workout. For three heats you pound through a minute each of wall balls, power cleans, push presses, double unders and box jumps with a minute rest in between.

I did this workout once in the beginning last year, when Lahaina Crossfit was visiting and participated in our workout too. My total rep count was 166, a low number but while everyone was cranking out 20, 30, 40 or more double unders for each set I cranked out five or six.

I'm working on it damn it. In fact 5 or 6 double unders is a new highlight for me. Yay.

Anyway, after the workout, Bumper comes up to me and says, "Rod,  the girls are saying we're 0 and 3 for boys night out." Then gives me the look that says, "What are YOU going to do about this?"

What? Really? Do we really want to go there Bump? You're going to make me in charge of this? The newly divorced guy with 12 years of prior debauchery and hedonism under his belt from his days of living on Oahu?

Anyway I gave him the same look he gives me when I try to jump from 135 to 225 on push-press.  It's the look that says, "are you sure about this?"

Okay okay okay, I'm kidding. Mostly. I'm 38 now and I like to drink during the day and sleep at night. I have a few ideas:

- On July 4th we used to do this thing called the "Floatilla" where we anchor boats off of Waikiki and drank and surfed all day. Maybe we can recreate the event on Maui. Anyone got a boat?
- We paddleboard in Kihei during the day then go out that same night in the area one Saturday. As I am from Paia I would want to stay in Kihei and not drive. I might be able to get a comp room at the Maui Coast for all of us. Two beds and a fold out couch should be enough.
- Twilight golf at the Dunes and everyone brings their own liquor to the course. Some sort of drinking game ensues. First one who drives their golf cart into the water loses.
- Can we say Vegas? No? Oahu maybe? Hana? I once set up an excursion where we rented a van and drove to Seven Sacred Pools and camped there, all the while jumping off of every waterfall from Haiku to Hana ending with a jump off of "the bridge" near the Pools. Those were the days of my youth and my body aches at the thought of doing that again but I am willing if we have enough recruits.

Anyway I'm sure we can think of something. Vegas, what? I must be hearing things, sorry.

And finally tonight, I'm responding to a critique from Kehau about not commenting on her blog posts, which are smartly written and entertaining.

However, I must be able to relate to the subject matter. For example, crockpot cooking.

Really? And the following discussion about making your own beef stock. Again, really?

I'm beginning to sense that Kehau's blog is geared more towards the female Crossfitter/foodie/skanker. This blog is geared more towards us less talented types, who aren't good at everything that they do.

And with that, I say aloha and let's do that boy's night out real soon.

Lataz,

Rod

Found my Lululemon shorts

It's been driving me nuts. I paid $60 for those shorts! (Long story short: I followed a cute gal into the Paia store and had to buy something so it didn't look like I was stalking her.)

But this was back Janurary. I wore them once then I lost them. Instead I went and got some cheapo replacements from Footlocker, which cost $9.99.

They're both black, have the built in spandex and are made of some tough, stretchy sort of nylon material. So why the price difference? Well, my consumer reporting skills are somewhat lacking but I will try to explain. Mainly I found two, count them two important differences:

- Lululemon shorts have pockets. The Footlocker version doesn't.
- Your ass sweat seeps through and shows in the Footlocker version. Lululemon keeps it all inside.

Yup. I'm not sure what the hell they make the Lululemon shorts out of but if you don't want your ass sweat to show, these are the shorts for you. That's what $60 buys you and damn it, it's worth it.

And in case you were wondering my Lululemon shorts were hidden underneath a pair of khaki shorts that I don't wear anymore.

Also I have to bust a couple of my female gym partners. It might have been sometime last week when we had to do overhead squats I believe. They were watching Luke do the workout and one of them says, and I kid you not, "I love watching Luke workout, he's so smooth."

Okay, so if you don't know Luke this might seem a bit weird or pervy. But Luke's body mechanics are such that he does perfect technique on almost everything. Unlike myself. Usually I make up my own technique which leaves Bumper shaking his head. Think caveman powerlifting and you get the idea.

This would be the opposite of Luke. If you haven't seen Luke's muscle-ups you haven't hated yourself lately. It's so perfect you feel like either kicking his ass or kissing his hand, so I sort of understand what these gals, who will go unnamed, were admiring.

THEN AGAIN . . . they were probably looking at his butt go up and down too and loving every second of it. One of our trainers Kristi has unreal stomps when she does any sort of snatch and grab movement. She stomps her feet hard on the gym floor and that weight goes up like nothin. I was stunned and watched her over and over again to try and copy what she was doing.

Of course, when it comes down to it I'm still a guy staring at a woman's legs. You sort of have to, just like these gals were watching Luke. So it's sort of like a free pass to stare under the pretense of studying biomechanics.

Out loud you say: "Damn, that's good technique."

Inside you say: "My gym is awesome. I'm never going back to 24/Hour Fitness."

Hey, that's a freaking great idea for a commercial. Would have been better for TV than radio though. Ah well.

Also my son is here! He's living with daddy this summer and I couldn't be happier about it. Of course I took a couple days off from RFM but I should be back on Friday (tomorrow).

Betcha you're wondering who those two gals were that were staring at Luke huh? Not gonna tell ya. Gotta protect my sources.

Later,

Rod

Weak

You know, when I first started this blog I didn't really have a direction. Just slap something up there and keep writing.

I've also been sort of the same way at the gym. Just go and workout. Do the Workout of the Day (WOD.) Get sweatin. Fall on the ground then go home.

But you know, that just isn't enough. Nuh-uh.

I've been seeing some performance problems lately. (No, not the Viagra kind.) Mostly involving leg strength.

Up until now I've had the attitude that my legs will get stronger eventually, but yesterday's workout was so pitiful that I may have to reevaluate that. I couldn't do one pistol squat. Not even one. Like just ONE.

And I'm always out of breath on my runs. And I'm just talking about the jog we go on before the warmup.

How sad is that? I've been doing Crossfit for months now. But I think I know the reason why.

The reason is I haven't been pushing it. I haven't tried to go beyond my capabilities. If you don't do that then you don't improve.

The only place I've been trying to do that is using my upper body strength when it comes to lifting heavy weights. Yes I've had some good gains but I don't want to just excel in that area.

Even Derek made a comment which was flattering and yet very telling at the same time.

He was watching me throw up some heavy weights during the push-press and said, "Man, I wish I had your upper body. Like from your chest up. But that's it."

It was one of those compliment/jokes which I thought was actually pretty funny but then got me thinking.

I gotta start working on my weaknesses. My legs. It's time. Time to push it. I want to be able to do pistol squats again like I did when I was younger. Freaking Kehau and Lori did a combined 200 reps yesterday.

Usually I would look at something like that and just make fun of myself for not being as strong as the girls, but really, I need to step it up. Time to stop hiding behind humor.

Not that the jokes will stop, but I need to step it up. We'll see what happens today if I can back up what I'm posting.

On another note, Kehau has a pretty cool fitness blog and she's writing about cool stuff, like learning how to swim. She has cool subject matter and I'm sort of jealous.

Looks like I gotta step up the game here too. Otherwise no one is going to want to buy a I hate Cardio tshirt.

Later,

Rod

Hey look, Kehau started her own fitness blog!!!

www.changfit.wordpress.com
But don't click on it yet because she's doing a "soft lunch" first, which means "I'm too chicken to put this thing out in public."

So I'm helping her by getting it out there. Not that there's a danger of being overexposed on my own fitness website which six people read every other week but hey, it's a start.

Right on Kehau, you go for it. I enjoyed her learning to swim post and you will too. Go get 'em.

Rod

Crossfit RFM gets some Countywide exposure

Stacia and I wrote a little article in the County employee newsletter that appears this month. Hopefully the 2000+ County employees who read it decide to check out the gym this summer. Enjoy folks:

******************************************

The following is a personal narrative from County employees

Stacia Ash and Rod Antone regarding their experiences at

Crossfit Raw Fitness Maui which is located at

800 Eha St.

Stacia: On March 10, as part of the County’s health and wellness

program, Kristi and Robert at Raw Fitness Maui offered

County employees a free Demo class at their Wailuku based

gym Crossfit RFM. I attended this free session with several

county employees including Holly, Rod Antone and Mike.

Rod: Just to let everyone know Robert “Bumper” Kikuchi is my

classmate (Maui High c/of 90!!!) and he talked me into checking

out his gym during our 20-year class reunion this summer. I did

and it changed my life, no joke.

Stacia: Rod’s about 6 months ahead of me training wise. For

me, my Cross-fit workout began with a brief overview of the

Cross-fit format. Next we did a warm-up and Robert gave us

some instruction and demonstrated some of the movements in

the workout of the day (WOD). Then we did a modified work-out

and got our heart rates up!! Finally we ended with a gentle cooldown

and stretch.

Rod: My first workout I warmed up with a 200-meter run then

did a quick sit-up, push-up and squat routine that made me

sweat right off the bat. Then I tried to do seven sets of seven

rep thrusters and burpees. I failed totally and think I got three

sets max before collapsing. Don’t worry, Bumper only saves that

for his classmates.

Stacia: For me, I found this style of working out to be fun,

exciting and motivating. Part of what made this so is that we

work out together, cheering each other on and subtly competing

against and pushing each other. I also enjoy the fact that you

never have to decide what you are going to do that day, it is

all decided ahead of time by the instructors and laid out on the

whiteboard for you to see and follow. The weekly workouts are

also posted on the web, so you can see in advance what you

will be doing so you can prepare mentally if need be!! (or avoid

a particularly intimidating day)

Rod: Stacia is right. Working out at Crossfit is like being at a

team practice. You warm up together, you work out together and

you compete against each other AND support each other at the

same time. Everybody has strengths and weaknesses and each

workout addresses each person’s own set of limitations.

Stacia: Also the emphasis at Crossfit at all times is to ensure all

participants are able to safely perform the exercises correctly

with proper technique and form. Because the focus is on quality

of instruction, technique, safety and effectiveness, they require

all new clients to attend a series of introductory “Elements”

sessions before being eligible to attend the open classes. The

Elements program is a series of 6 sessions (3x a week, Mon.,

Wed., Fri.) over a 2 week period. Now, normally the Elements

sessions cost $160, but they generously offered COM employees

to attend this for FREE!!!

Rod: The cost might worry some people but I would never pay

this for a regular gym. Crossfit RFM is more like having a personal

trainer, which would usually cost $60 an hour. Once you

try it you’ll understand why it’s worth it.

 

Stacia: Although I am adventurous I am also frugal so I was

worried about cost too. Still I decided to give it a try and I am

glad I did!! Not only did I love the work-out format, but I LOVE

the instructors (who are buff, beautiful and lovely people), I love

the other gung-ho participants who attend, and I LOVE the actual

work-outs. I am already a very active person. But this style

of working out is all new to me…..they have me doing really

interesting difficult things that I would not normally do!! For example,

I cannot do a full pull-up on bar, I can squeeze out about

one half of a pull-up…shameful I think. But at this gym, we use

assist bands and I find myself able to do almost 10 pull-ups!!! I

am so proud and I can’t wait to get stronger and move up to the

next band/level of difficulty! Plus we jump-rope and do so many

isometric exercises I never dreamed of.

Rod: They are buff and yes Kristi is very cute (Bumper not so

much) but looking great is secondary at Crossfit RFM. The main

thing is they want you to feel great. They want you to be able

to run up those stairs and not get tired or carry your kids and

chase them around the house and not be winded. Your body will

get physically fit as you train but the difference is you’ll have the

practical strength, speed and stamina to go along with it, unlike

a regular gym.

Stacia: I just finished my 6 Elements sessions and I am super

excited to begin working out with the group…I start tomorrow! I

highly encourage all county employees to give this format/gym

a try. They have free classes on Saturdays at 10 a.m. and it’s so

addicting!

For more information, visit www.rawfitnessmaui.com.