Thanks. I think.

I'd like to thank Bruce and Patty for trying to fix my back today before the WOD.

Bruce tried to rip the skin off of my lower back and Patty tried to drag me across the room by my legs.

Other than that I had a great time.

Ok I'm going to have to finish this blog later. My hamstrings are totally whack right now in my right leg.

*******************

Yeah okay  that shower helped. Whew.

So today. I squatted. With Bruce.

I did five reps of 225. He did ten reps of 315.

My right leg hamstrings were bothering me the whole time I was driving home. They're still bothering me now as I type this blog.

I think it's from squatting. But who the hell knows. Maybe it's from the WOD.

Today's WOD was seven handstand push-ups, 14 KB swing and 28 DU's for five rounds.

I tried going fast. Finished just before 9 minutes at 8:59.

Felt good about that. HSPU's were good. KB's didn't kill the back. DU's were moving pretty quickly.

In fact nothing to complain about except this damn tightness in my leg.

Okay, let's see if it's there tomorrow. Pain pain go away, come again . . . when I'm not supposed to enter a power clean competition at the end of the week.

Seriously.

Late guys,

Rod

Okay, one more time

I truly believe that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery so I was thrilled to see that CrossfitOneWorld (www.crossfitoneworld.com) reposted my link to the 60 Minutes video about sugar being toxic.

Actually they posted the Youtube copy of the story because there's trouble with the link. If you have trouble just Google "60 Minutes" and the words "sugar" and "toxic" and you'll find it. Here it is again just in case.

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7403942n

I'm telling you, watch this report by Dr. Sanjay Gupta, who is probably one of the world's leading broadcast news journalists on medical news if not THE top medical reporter in the world, and you will have NO TROUBLE giving up the sugar portion of the Paleo diet.

And if I was still a journalist, I probably would have tried to localize the story by talking to HC&S. I mean, how does the local sugar industry on Maui feel about something like that? The only good thing is their competitors, the corn syrup industry, felt the bomb too because they were all considered toxic.

I guess the golden rule is, get your sugar from fruits. Period.

Damn it I am going to miss ice cream. That and when my son gets here this summer I'm going to have a hell of a time changing his diet.

On another note.

So my last post I said I was "protecting my back" using Biofuel and Icy Hot and other Tiger Balmish muscle ointments and lotions and such. And of course Beezelbump says hey, try using good form.

Ahem. Dude. I am. But those KB swings take a toll on you, especially if you're going to do 100 of  them. Just like doing 30 snatches in a row caused you, me and Frank to be disoriented and walk like the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz.

The difference is that with the Icy Hot I can at least finish the workout. Who knows, if I had done that during the snatches maybe I could have thrown up a couple of reps with the next weight.

I'm just sayin.

But enough about me. Check out what this one gal, Annie, posted on the CrossfitOneWorld site about the Paleo diet. Not a bad argument:

Sorry caveman people, you are not eating like a caveman. Having meat everymeal? They didnt have fridges and freezers. They caught something, feasted on it probably raw for a while till it went bad or was gone. Then had to survive on greens, seeds, fruit ect. the remainder of the time, sometimes for days until their next kill. None of this cooked fish, steak, eggs,chicken, all in one day. duh. Stop thinking because someone told you its eating like a caveman that it is...start thinking for yourself, commmon sense. Good fad tho!


I'm thinking she's right, Paleo isn't EXACTLY what the caveman ate back then.

Then again, who knows? I wasn't there back then and I'm pretty sure she wasn't either.

What she doesn't talk about is whether the diet works or not. I'm not sure she's tried it, she didn't indicate that either way.

Not sure how to take this. Obviously she's dismissing Paleo as a "fad" but maybe also promoting a more vegan diet?

I've often wondered about going vegetarian because, let's face it, I've got some bulk on me. It's shapely bulk no doubt but bulk nonetheless. Yes, round is a shape so shut up.

Anyway, thought her critique might invoke some responses out there. Yes, this is called "provoking the audience/reader." I used to do this for a living folks.

So, any thoughts? Hopefully you folks can find a way to post. Let the Blogger gods be with you.

Rod

Check Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself

Oh man, remember how happy I was to discover that if I put some sort of Icy Hot or Tiger Balm on my back BEFORE I workout then I'm more likely to avoid back pain?

Welllllll . . . my back just let me know what it thinks about that plan this morning.

I am stiff and sore. Kats just posted on my Facebook page and agreed saying his "back was fried."

I'm thinking that if you do 100 kettlebell swings in one WOD then you're back is going to get sore, no matter what you rub on it. Damn.

Yeah yeah yeah, I'll explain.

So yesterday's workout was five rounds of 10 pull-ups, 20 kettlebell swings and 30 double-unders.

Before that we were going for our one rep max on power cleans. I got up to 205, but then FAILED at 225.

I don't know what it is, but I'm freaked out about getting under that weight. It feels like when you're on a wave and about to go over but pull back at the last second.

Fear kills.

But the 205 was a personal best for me so I was happy about that at least. As soon as I figure out how not to be scared I'll kick 225's ass all over the gym.

Anyway, then came the WOD.

I had Alex rub that Biofuel stuff on my back this time. I'm slowly making my way around the gym and asking different people to put this stuff on my back each time because it sucks to have this crap on your fingers.

So yeah, I'll be asking YOU soon. Count on it.

Anyway, I'm feeling good about the workout. I figure (1) my pull-ups are solid (2) the Biofuel will protect my back from the KB swings and (3) my DU's are better with my duct-taped shoes and Jun's jump rope.

I'm even thinking I might be able to beat Marcus.

Yes, I know what you're thinking. "Foolish foolish foolish creature . . ."

Anyway, we start the WOD. I crank out the pull-ups and jump off before Marcus. Then I crank the KB's and end before Marcus. Then I start doing the DU's and . . . I'm doing a good job but Marcus rips past me and then jumps on the pull-up bars.

I get there not too long afterwards but it's tough to catch up. The KB swings are getting tougher and it takes me slightly longer to finish. The DU's get easier though so that helps.

But somewhere along the WOD the forearms start getting TIRED. Because I'm using them to grip the bar, grip the KB handles and spin my jump rope really fast so I can do DU's.

In fact my forearms are so shot I couldn't even type my blog last night, which is why I had to wait until today to do it. And right now my forearms are still sore.

The only difference is my back is shot too.

Oh man. Crossfit. It's never what you expect.

Ouch.

Later,

Rod

Bob's Advice

You guys know Bob right? My cousin's husband who I brought into the RFM world way back and now he can't live without it.

Well Bob was at the 4 p.m. workout and had some sage advice for me as I got ready for the 5 p.m. class.

"It's all about the 800 today, just go for it."

He's a smart man and that's exactly what I did.

But I digress, let me explain.

Today's workout was a lot of running. Run 800 meters, come back and do 40 lunges, then drop and do 20 sit-ups. Then run 400 meters, do 30 lunges and 15 sit-ups, finally run the 200 meter, do 20 lunges and 10 sit-ups.

Bob was right. You gotta do well at the 800 because that's the only run that you have before the lunges. After that your legs are kinda toast.

To prep for this Bump in his wisdom decides we need to run before we run. So we hold some sprint races and I get paired with Bruce's 20 something year old son that is a lean mean Crossfitting machine. This kid is born to do this stuff.

But then we do this one race where we sit down, cross-legged and have to get up and turn around then take off running.

I knew I had the advantage because, well, I'm half filipino. You can't beat a filipino at squatting and then taking off real fast. We all learn from grandpa at the chicken fights. You're all squatting down betting and watching the fights then the cops come and raid the place and you gotta take off. Grandpa's gotta carry his $1000 fighting rooster and the cash so he's got no room for you.

Anyway, you get the idea. I've got genetics on my side as well as early childhood skills training.

So Bump says go and lo and behold I uncross my legs, get up and turn around faster than my young partner.

This buys me about a second and a half. He then zips past me like Hussein Bolt zips past a parked car.

Ah well, I beat him on the get up. At 39 you take your victories where you can.

So that was the warm up, then for strength we're doing deload back squats and Ikaika says something wonderful.

"Let's just do the greens the yellows and the blues today."

Meaning let's just use the 25, 35 and 45 lbs plates. No more, no less. I'm thrilled. Bruce of course does not think this is appropriate for real men and has to go 20 lbs heavier than everyone else. I'm not drinking the Kool Aid, sorry.

Then it's time for the WOD. I try to stay in the front but I fall behind quickly. Still I'm running faster than I usually would, I'm pushing pretty hard and getting winded.

Then it's back to the gym for 40 lunges. Tough, leg-burning lunges. These hurt and I'm glad to lie down and do sit-ups.

After that it just gets easier. Except for the end when someone's 13-year-old kid blows past me during the last 200 meter run. What's up with the kids kicking the old man's ass today? I try but can't catch up with him but I hit the last ten sit-ups hard and finish before he does.

Yeah. That's right. I beat some kid that can't even shave yet. Take that.

Goals. You gotta have 'em.

Oh yes, Icy Hot before the workout. Key. Can't even tell you how this saved my back from stiffening up during the run today. I'm gonna buy a vat of this stuff. Soon.

By the way, I'd like to say sorry to all of my faithful readers, meaning my fellow RFMer's and maybe Freddy and Chyna in Cali and DMeyer in Oregon, because Blogger is EFFING UP MY COMMENTS PAGE.

People have been complaining that they've been trying to leave comments and can't do it. All I can say is trying using Google Chrome as your browser, that seems to help.

 Dude, it's free. Not much I  can do to complain about this. I'll try to search  for some answers though.

In the meantime, peace out,

Rod

Conquering DU's: Duct tape, Jun's rope and My Hattori's

So if you've been reading this blog with any sort of regularity you know that double unders and I have a love/hate relationship.

Actually it's more like a one-night stand. DU's show up, get me all excited, then they don't come back until they want to.

Well that's about to change. I think.

First off, big ups to my man Jun who donated one of his jump ropes to the I Hate Cardio cause. He knows I can only do the DU's with a certain type of rope and lo and behold one of them shows up hanging in the gym one day with my name taped to it.

You da man.

Quite possibly Jun was influenced by his wife Shauna who totally rips at double-unders. I think she told him "Jun please give Rod a good jump rope so that he stops these angry stares when I'm doing DU's. It's like he's jealous or something."

If I looked jealous that's because I was jealous. But not anymore.

So now I have this cool rope and my very light, very awesome Saucony Hattori shoes that everybody made fun when I first bought them but damn, they work.

The only catch is they're so light that there's not much protection when you miss a DU and the rope snaps against my feet. My toes feel like they're going to break or start bleeding.

Seriously. It's enough to screw with me mentally so that I can't get the timing right on the DU's.

Then on Saturday I discovered that we have duct tape in the RFM office.

It looks stupid but it FRIGGIN WORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jun's jump rope, plus my Hattori's plus the duct tape for protection equals ROD RIPPING AT DU'S!!!!

Well, ripping for me anyway. For some stupid reason I kept getting stuck at my 22nd rep, every single freakin time.

I've never been so happy that I went to a Saturday workout. This one was complex: AMRAP for 5 minutes 30 DU's and 20 sit-ups, rest 3 minutes then AMRAP for 5 minutes again 10 shoulder to ceiling with heavy dumbbells and 10 box jumps, then rest 3 minutes again and the last AMRAP was 10 pull-ups and 10 burpees.

The DU's were cake. Usually 30 DU's would take forever but not this time.

As for the rest of the workout, the box jumps were tough and so were the shoulder to ceiling, especially with 50 lbs dumbbells. Pull-ups were easy but of course, burpees will always suck.

A good workout and a good discovery. And yes the tape is still on my shoes and it's going to stay there.

PEACE!!! Enjoy your Sunday people,

Rod

Elizabeth !@#$* Me Today

There are some workouts that scare me.

There are some that worry me.

There are others that make me do the Sign of the Cross.

Today was the first one that I said to myself, "Nope, ain't gonna do it."

Elizabeth: 21, 15, 9 reps of cleans AND ring dips.

Yeah, I know what you're saying. "But Rod, you've gotten those power cleans down right?"

No no no no. That was my first mistake. These aren't power cleans, these are just CLEANS.

As in clean it then squat down to the bottom. All the way down then come back up.

Did I say the RX was 135 lbs? What the hell man.

Ok, first thing's first. For strength it was presses. Oh joy. At least I could claim some manhood with those.

Ended up doing 155 six times. Yessir, the delts are gettin stronger every year. Next year I'll do 185 six  times.

Yes I'm bragging. I have to. Because what comes next is downright pitiful.

We start the WOD and I do five cleans. They take forever and my legs are tired already.

So I say screw it and start doing power cleans. They're still tough mind you but not nearly as stupidly tough as regular cleans.

I haven't done ring dips for a while but I manage to crank them out with some speed. For the first 10 I think. After that I'm doing two and three at a time.

Then more cleans. I try about 4 regular cleans on the second set. Yeah right. Back to power cleans.

Dips hurt harder this time but I'm glad not to be doing cleans.

Back to the last 9 cleans. I try two. Screw it. I do power cleans and then almost forget to do the ring dips.

Yeah, not even failure. Just plain old "no I don't want to do that."

Nope. No thank you. See you later.

And Elizabeth? I'll call you next time, okay?

Peace,

Rod

Farmer's Forearm Failure Fo real

Having a hard time clenching my fists right now and you know why.

Farmer's Walk, 200 meters.

The rest of the WOD was cake. In fact this is the second WOD  that was two parts cake and one part big fat hairy bitch.

Not sure what Bump's doing, I think it might be some sort of psych-out mentally and physically.

It's working because I'm psyched out. My body is confused. Not sure of what to expect.

That's the point right?

So the WOD is 10 box jumps, 10 sit-ups and a 200 meter farmer's carry using the heaviest weight you can handle. AMRAP in 15 minutes.

So I grab some 40's and so does Ikaika. Bruce goes for the 60's like the beast he is and I think Kats grabbed the 44's by default. Sorry man.

The WOD starts and sure enough, everybody kinda cruises through the box jumps and sit-ups and in no time we're all grabbing our weights to go walk.

I make it to the fence and turn around but I have to put my weights down. Ikaika does too and looks at me and says, "Brah, this is just the first round."

We all make it back, crank out the second set of box jumps and sit-ups and again hit the weights. Ikaika is ahead of me this time and on his way back he says, "I cannot feel my forearms anymore."

I know brah, I know. My grip is toast and I don't even know if we hit the halfway mark yet.

I manage to crank out four sets and a few more box jumps and the 15 minutes is done. I'm not lying down and rolling around on the floor like I'm used  to doing. We're all just standing around with limp arms, not feeling anything below the elbows.

Okay, I know this is a short blog but I have to stop typing right now. It's hard to move my fingers.

Later,

Rod

Before I Forget

As a former journalist I have two favorite TV news programs which do a fantastic job gathering and presenting the facts. One is Frontline and the other is 60 Minutes.

That's why when 60 Minutes said they had a story about new research on sugar, I made sure I watched.

You guys should too. New research is showing that beyond weight gain, sugar can take a serious toll on your health, worsening conditions ranging from heart disease to cancer.

Watch it now or later but watch it. Promise me guys. Here's the link: http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7403942n

Watch it? Good, now you can read my blog.

Been trying to be more careful eating, and also kicking it up a notch while training.

What's cool is I'm not super strict Paleo right now and still trimming down. It's good because this is a more reasonable way to eat, and easier to maintain. I've stayed away from ice cream, cakes and pies but sometimes I'll eat a piece of an apple from an apple pie. Just a little bit to get some sweetness and then walk away.

Not easy. But easier after I watched that 60 Minutes report. (Watch it yet? Just checking.)

As a result my workouts have been getting better. It's weird how that happens. You workout harder to improve your results and as a result you improve your workout. Hahahahaha. I'm a literary geek, sorry.

Today I was hoping to shred this workout: four rounds of 10 handstand push-ups, 10 pull-ups and 40 double unders.

I know I know. Frickin double unders. They're sooooooooooooooooo frustrating. Sometimes you have 'em and sometimes you don't.

BUT . . . I've got the pull-ups now. Cranking out 10 faster than the HSPU's even. Damn it.

Because it made it all the more frustrating.  The fact that my HSPU's and pull-ups were getting done in less than two minutes but I WAS TAKING 3 MINUTES TO DO DOUBLE UNDERS. ARGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I managed to finally get them going for rounds 3 and 4, sort of. But then the HSPU's started failing. C'mon man, seriously?

Plus I got even more frustrated because some of our members like SHAUNA are frickin going off on DU's. She was going so fast today I thought she was going to hit 88 miles per hour and go back in time. MENTAL speed. Think she got a good score? Yeah.

I don't know what my time was. Not that I was that disgusted but I just had to leave right away. I'll look tomorrow.

Oh and one more thing, ever since Kehau left the music at the box has changed. More rock. Heard some AC/DC and Motley Crue today. Good stuff. We still miss you girl but it's nice to get some man music going now.

Shoots people, I'm out.

Later,

Rod

Crossfit, Bruce Lee and Why Hawaiian Telcom Hates Me

I've been away from the blog for a while but not by choice.

For some reason Hawaiian Telcom has seen fit to deny me internet access at home. Bastards.

Yeah I know, I could write on my phone but I HATE that. My fingers were made for the keyboard.

Anyway, so yesterday a friend from Honolulu was in town and I took him to lunch. While we were waiting for the food he asked me, "So what is Crossfit anyway?"

I tried to explain, talked about how each gym is different but how we follow the same sort of sort of model.

Like a lot of people who haven't done the workouts he's confused. I'm not helping because it's a harder question to answer than I thought.

Then this morning I got up to get some water and I realize why it's hard. Crossfit isn't a workout, it's an IDEA. It's the theory, a philosophy. Much like how Bruce Lee's Jeet Kune Do wasn't a style of martial arts.

That's when I couldn't go back to sleep. I've often thought how cool it would be to go back in time and to be a part of Bruce Lee's classes from the start and here I am, participating in this fitness movement that is definitely a nationwide phenomenon but still getting established.

Okay maybe it's already established but you get my point. It's just cool to be part of something new that I think will one day be recognized in history. Fitness history anyway. Found a quote from this guy from the Pacific Institute of Sports Medicine in British Columbia who said that  "Used safely and sensibly, I believe CrossFit has potential not just to change people’s lives, but also to change the fitness industry for the better."

Ya think? Anyway, sorry to get all serious on you there. The things I think of early in the morning.

Back to the workouts.

Been some challenging workouts this week. Tuesday was FIVE ROUNDS of 10 power cleans, 20 sit ups and 30 double unders. Actually the only hard part was the DU's. Fricking 18 minutes to do that workout. SUCKED.

By the way, I've learned that Icy Hot is my best friend. Found a tube of it in the gym (Thank you Bruce) and had Kristi rub some on my lower back (sorry Bump but she was closest, heh) and I had NO problems during the workout. Power cleans usually destroy my back, especially high rep.

Oh yes and props to Ken for doing the workout in LESS THAN 9 MINUTES . . . WTF? Is he on roids? A cyborg? Sacrifice animals? How the hell . . ?

Then I realized that he has double unders and probably wasn't spending 2 minutes trying to do 30 reps. Yah, that makes a small kine difference.

So if you read my last workout that means we did thrusters and power cleans back to back on Monday and Tuesday. So thankfully Bump had mercy and threw this on the board: 3 rounds of AMRAP of 5 pull-ups, 10 push-ups and 15 air squats.

Good workout. Did 11 rounds and kept a pretty good pace. Of course guys like Marcus and Ikaika were doing 15 and 18 rounds but hey, I'm still feelin pretty good about this week.

Overall I think I've been improving and it's been a really simple change. Concentrate on speed and screw the  weights. I'm still throwing on the plates during the strength workout so I'm not getting weaker at all.

Been a good year so far. Me likey 2012.

Shoots, later gang,

Rod

Chyna Planks. Greatest RFM Warm-up Demonstration EVER

So everybody knows I Hate Cardio.

But I especially hate certain types of cardio. Specifically burpees and thrusters.

And today we got to do them both in one workout. Happy happy joy joy.

But before we talk about the WOD, let's talk about the warm-up. Because today was a warm up like no other.

For today Freddy and Chyna were taking the reins and leading the 5 p.m. class.

If you don't know who Freddy and Chyna are then go read my last post. Or check out www.crossfitoneworld.com. They're quite qualified.

Even so, I was a little nervous. My back gets tight real easy and I sorta depend on the watchful eyes of our coaches, one of which is a certified physical therapist, on keeping me out of trouble and pain.

But I shouldn't have worried. Turns out Freddy has flexibility problems as well and Chyna says her back flares up so much that she doesn't even bother doing deadlifts anymore.

I was like, wow. Really? So I can have a whacked out, lower back prone to spasms AND be a world class athlete?

That's not what they said but that's how I heard it. Made me feel better about myself and the fact that I can move beyond my physical limitations or what I considered my limits.

Anyway, so Freddy steps in for Bump and he starts the warm-up. We do this 100 rep jump rope race and I find out how slow I am on singles. It was like jump rope, 10 burpees then jump rope 10 burpees and repeat. Definitely something to get the heart racing.

It was pretty different from the slow, methodical torture that Bump puts us through but just as effective. Then we laid down on our backs and did some sort of "Simon-Says" game with our four limbs that I'm not going to even try to explain here.

THEN . . . we do this plank thing which Freddy calls up Chyna to demonstrate.

Now, if you've read my last blog or met Chyna in person you know what she looks like. Not going to explain here.

Today she's working out in a bikini top and my 6-year-old son's underwear.

Needless to say we were all watching her plank technique very seriously. I've never studied the proper plank form with more intent.

At some point I looked around the room to see if others felt the same way I did but no one's eyes met my gaze because they were paying attention to the demonstration.

After the demonstration I planked like I've never planked before. Oh how I planked. With one arm and one leg in the air we planked and tested our core strength.

Then it was over and we could all breathe again.

Freddy must have wanted to make sure he didn't lose our attention because he added good mornings to the warm-up and called upon Chyna again to demonstrate.

All I have to say is that the Crossfit One World Gym in Union City's membership must be through the roof.

Then, praise God we were allowed to lift some weights. Deadlifts. I was very happy to lift weights of any sort at that point.

(Before I start talking about the workout I have to talk about braddah Bruce. I was setting up my bar and asked if Bruce wanted to work out with me. Chyna was listening and afterwards when Bruce responded she said "I have no idea what he just said.")

Okay, some quick lessons in local talk for everyone.

Bruce's response to me was, "Ho what brah you like jump in wit me and Ikaika? We stay set up ova dea already."

What he meant was, "Excuse me my friend, would you like to join Ikaka and I? Our deadlifting area is set up and so is our bar, so feel free to rotate into our workout."

Thanks Bruce but I counted him, Ikaika and Kats over there and just me and Ken over here. Ken's a good guy and I like working out with him, somehow he pushes me without saying anything.

Today I didn't do too bad, I think we went up to 270 and only cranked out 7 reps. Ken did 9 I think. Not my best deadlift workout but my back was tightening up and I was worried about the WOD.

So WOD time comes and Freddy tells us to man up and grab a heavy weight. I do 95 pounds. It's enough, believe me.

Because I'm sticking with what Bump said earlier last month. Go for speed and reps. Strength comes from the strength workout. Use the WOD to work the cardio.

Stick to the plan, stick to the plan.

So I do. Today the WOD was you had 2 min 30 sec to run 200 meters, do 10 thrusters then pound out as many burpees as possible in whatever time you have remaining. Four rounds.

The clock starts and we hit it. (Can I say how good it feels to run in my Saucony Hattori's? They're the best.)

I come in last for the first run but I finish first for the thrusters. At least I think I did. Then I pump out 12 burpees.

We get to rest for 90 seconds between rounds and during that time I'm thinking if I can do 10 burpees per round I'll at least do half of what Chyna did. (She had 82 burpees.) It's a good goal.

Well I did 10 burpees each for rounds 2 and 3 but by round 4 I was out of gas. Three burpees in the time I had left. Dayum.

So I had a total of 35 burpees. Not bad. I'm content.

And so today we say goodbye to Freddy and Chyna. Thanks for the memories and hopefully I can figure out what the problem is on my blog so that you can leave some comments.

Oh and Chyna, thanks for the promotional material. I'm making t-shirts with this picture then going on a tour of every single Crossfit gym in America and blogging after each WOD.

Yeah right, not a bad idea though right? Take I Hate Cardio on the road, might be fun.

Later gang, see you at the box,

Rod

Big Trouble in Little Chyna

First off, I am obese.

Yep, that's what the nurse from Kaiser said to me on Thursday.

There was this Health and Wellness Fair downstairs at my workplace and I went down to check it out. Got a five minute massage, had some sort of health shot of blended green stuff and then went over to the Kaiser Permanente booth. 

There I tested my grip, got my blood pressure read and my body fat tested.

So according to Kaiser I am 5'7", 201 pounds and obese.

The nurse circled the word right there in front of me and then said it.

"So according to this you're obese," as if I couldn't read the damn thing. "You need to exercise."

"Um, I workout at least 3 to 4 times a week," I say, trying not to be angry.

"Well how are your eating habits?"

"I try to eat just vegetables and protein."

"Well you should eat white rice, pasta, things to fill you up."

So like the total opposite of the Paleo diet. Anyway I think she knew I was getting upset because I was giving her the look that said, "I'm going to power clean you now so that you can see how strong I am and how not obese these muscles are." Instead I said thanks and left and made sure to take the slip of paper with the word "obese" circled on it with me for motivation.

Anyway, for the rest of the day I was like, that's it. I'm gonna eat MORE vegetables and do Ab Ripper X on my non-Crossfit days and then I'm taking that stupid Body Mass Index test again. 

My anger carried me into the next day. It was Good Friday and I had that off so I ran some errands and bought a big plastic container of grilled vegetables topped off with a kale salad from Mana Foods. And you know what? It was pretty damn good. I even bought a health drink that was made up of kale, celery, lemons and ginger. That stuff tasted like seawater. Oh well.

So I'm feeling good and rip roaring to go for the WOD that day. I feel lean and I'm kinda psyched because this is the sort of workout that I expected to do well in. AMRAP for 12 minutes: 5 upside down push-ups, 10 pull-ups and 20 double-unders. 

Yeah, the DU's were going to suck but I had a plan. Rip through the first two movements then try to concentrate on getting those DU's.

When I got there there was a whole crew there already, including some special friends from Union City, CA. Freddy Camacho Man Savage and Chyna "Halo Halo" Cho. They own Crossfit One World over there and are like Crossfit royalty. Freddy is a member of the Union City SWAT team because it's not manly enough to just own your own Crossfit gym. And Chyna is a walking, talking promotion for why women should workout at Crossfit instead of wasting time at Zumba.

No kidding man, she's built like Wonder Woman or She-Hulk or just name a female comic book superhero with a rockin bod and that's what she looks like. She is a professional bad ass and super-cool. All weekend long I was like a stupid little fanboy who got all excited at every interaction we had. My inner thoughts were retarded. If you could have heard them they would have sounded like this:

"Oooh, Chyna said hi to me."

"Oooh, Chyna laughed at something I said."

"Oooh, Chyna likes the name of my blog, "I HATE CARDIO."

I gotta admit I almost did a fist pump when she said that. It's just a huge compliment coming from her. She's just a total badass in the Crossfit world, like competed in the Crossfit Games and did really well kinda badass. Plus Freddy is a riot and both of them are just fun people to hang with. 

ANYWAY . . . where was I? Yeah, the Good Friday WOD.

We had a good group of people there and did two heats with the girls going first.

The whole time while watching the girls workout I was thinking, "Damn, 12 minutes is long frickin time." The girls rocked it though, even though Patty got WORKED doing pull-ups. Her hands were wrecked.

Then it was the guys turn and I realize that I'm working out with Freddy and Frank, who is the resident bad ass at RFM.

The whole time I'm thinking, stick with the plan, stick with the plan.

So we take off and I rip through the hand-stand push-ups and jump off the wall. Then I get on the pull-up bar and I am FLYING. I just got my pull-ups back last week and it felt like my muscles wanted to make up for lost time or something.

I'm first off the bar and grab the rope and DAMN IT!!!! I can't even get one DU going. It takes me so long to get 20 reps that Frank and  Freddy pass me by and are on their second rounds.

Ah crap. But I keep going and I notice that I'm not falling behind too much. Yeah those guys are ahead of me but I'm thinking maybe only by a round or two, which is pretty good for me. Usually the elite guys at the gym are like five or six rounds ahead while I suck wind.

But like I said, I'm feeling good. Maybe it's the kale salad or the image of the nurse circling the word "obese" in my mind but I'm pretty fired up.

And before I know it, the WOD is over. I got 6 rounds and 15 reps. I think Frank and Freddy got 8 rounds.

Not too shabby. Maybe I should eat kale more often.

In fact I was pretty stoked about my results. So when Ikaika came by and asked if I wanted to have a few beers I was like, "Yeah, that sounds great!"

Turns out  the whole crew was already heading to Wailuku First Friday and we headed  towards the beer garden.

This is Chyna and Lori outside the beer garden. Lori is short but not that short, Chyna's standing on a curb.

Afterwards people still wanted to hang out somewhere (because First Friday ends at 9) and I suggested Tiffany's.

Oh man, it was either the best idea I ever had or the worst. For me the best, for Bump the worst I think.

We get to Tiff's and grab a table. Freddy and Chyna get introduced to some local grinds while we grab more drinks and listen to karaoke. Frickin Freddy thought I was talking about some Japanese chick when I asked him if he liked karaoke. He said, "Who are you looking for? Kara Oki?" Mental.

Before too long some guy at the table next to us starts singing the C & K song "About You" which is the graduation song for Bumper and I. Right then Gary, another one of our classmates, comes by and points that out.

I look around and see another of our classmates, Lei,and so I say, "Hey, we should do a shot for the class of 90." Great idea. If we had stuck to just one shot that is.

What happened was that after I bought the shot each one of my fellow classmates said they needed to buy a shot as well. So we ended up doing four shots of tequila. For me that's just par for the course. I drink four shots and go home and watch Netflix and wake up with no hangover. 

For Bump though, it's a different story. He's a pretty healthy guy and while he is in shape at the gym, his liver is out of shape at the bar. Plus somehow he got talked into a fifth shot which I had nothing to do with.

(******THIS IS AN I HATE CARDIO EXCLUSIVE UPDATE: WE HAVE JUST LEARNED THAT BUMP HAD SIX SHOTS AT TIFFANY'S. REPEAT. BUMP HAD SIX SHOTS. WE NOW RETURN YOU TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED BLOG.********)

At the end of the night he's pretty hammered. Everybody ends up in my truck and Kats drives all of us. Bump and Kristi get dropped off at home and I crash at Kats and Lori's place down the street.

And the next morning I wake up and feel great.

Which is a good thing because Saturday was this big WOD at War Memorial Stadium involving ALL the Crossfit gyms on Maui. 

It starts at 9 a.m. and I think Bump and Kristi didn't get there until 9:15 or something. He was hurting and I was kinda laughing. He looked at me like I gave him all five (SIX!!!!) shots. 

No sir, you are the master of your own destiny. Suck it up and let's get to the WOD.

So the WOD of the day for everyone was a 400 meter run, 50 air squats, 40 sit-ups, 30 double-unders, 20 push-ups and 10 lunges.  After that you do everything again but this time in reverse the order so you end with another 400 meter run.

Not bad, no weights so it wasn't going to be totally brutal. But the sun was a new factor because us RFMer's usually workout inside the gym. Hence Val's sunblock protection look via Al Quaeda.

Personally the sun felt like a hammer. Then again I did have four shots of tequila the night before. I wasn't hurting but I wasn't really operating at my peak either.

So I've never done a WOD with more than a 100 people before but it wasn't bad. I have no idea what my time was but I felt pretty good about it. In fact everybody did, except for Bump. Kats kept telling me how stoked he was that his brother was the drunk one this time instead of him.

Afterwards we headed off to Bistro Manila for some bomb halo-halo to cool ourselves off. Everybody had a blast.

Anyway, I'd like to thank my RFM fam for taking what started out to be a bad Thursday because of that obesity thing and turning it into a pretty rad time. In less than 24 hours I did two WOD's, got to hang out with Chyna and Freddy and saw my Crossfit coach get totally wasted.

In other words, it's been a great weekend.

Later gang,

Rod

PS - if Freddy and Chyna are reading this, you guys rock. 

The Legend of Ron Nater

For those of you who don't know Ron, he's a Maui High graduate about a year older than me and Bump who just happened to encounter the RFM girls one night back in 2010.

Ron's in pretty good shape and the girls I guess were telling him about the benefits of Crossfit while both parties were under the influence of alcohol.

In the end, Ron decides to come to the gym to challenge Kehau to a WOD because that's what you do when you're drunk. You talk smack and then you either put up or shut up the next day.

Kehau beat him and Ron paid $50 bucks as per agreement.

Now, this is where things start to differ, because I ran into Ron last night.

The version I've heard from Kehau and others at the gym is that after Ron got beat he said he wanted to join the gym but then never did, which lead people to believe that he is a pansy that didn't want to workout at RFM because it was (a) too hard or (b) too shame because a girl beat him.

But then I ran into Ron last night and he says, "Yeah I really liked the workout and wanted to join but I was moving to Oahu the next week to start my HECO apprenticeship."

To which I reply, "Really? Because Kehau said you didn't come back because you were a wussy."

To which he responded with a "WHATTTTTTTTT?????????????? No way!!! Bumper even knew I was leaving!!!!"

And again I said, "That's not what I heard. I heard Kehau beat you so badly you didn't want to ever see a Crossfit gym again."

And then he said, "ARGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT'S IT!!!! I'M GOING TO TRAIN MY ASS OFF AND I WANT A REMATCH WITH KEHAU!!!!!"

It might have been one of the funniest things I've ever seen. He was so horrified that RFM thought he just gave up. He really did seem like he liked the workout and even said how it RFM would be good for him because the workouts "shock" your body and keep it fresh. 

I agree.

But looks like Kehau is going to have to come to RFM at some point to take on the Nater. Because he's coming back for revenge.

Cheehoo,

Rod

Scary Kristi, Morning Pain and Hail to the Chief

Had three good workouts in a row and it's time to blog so here we go.

First off, last week Tuesday's workout scared the hell out of me. But not why you think.

You could tell it was going to be fast and furious, 15-12-9 reps of pull-ups, dips and burpees.

I'm working on the whole go faster and be leaner thing. In this case I figured I should do bar dips instead of ring dips. Plus my chest was wasted after benching. No ego, just go for it and go fast. I'll build my strength during the strength workouts, which is why it's called strength workouts right?

We go for it and I actually get my pull-ups back. I realized by watching Frank that you really gotta push away from the bar so that you build up that rebound snap so you can pull yourself back up.

It was just in time too because I knocked out that first 15 pull-ups in good time. I actually did 10 ring dips then said screw it and switched to bar. The burpees were steady and I tried to go sorta fast but not like blazing or anything.

Second round went about the same way except I did all bar dips. Triceps were getting burnt and I was having a hard time. Everybody else seemed to have wasted tri's too so it was okay.

Third round and all of a sudden Kristi is giving me warnings. I didn't notice it but she and I were neck and neck through the whole WOD. She finishes her pull-ups first but then I pass her on the dips. I'm doing my burpees and she yelling at me, "I'M COMING ROD, I'M RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!"

Holy crap it was scary. Scarier than Carrol's exorcist voice. Kristi sounded like if she caught up to me she was going to eat me or something. I felt like a kid for a second who thinks there's a monster under the bed and I tried to do 9 burpees as fast as I could.

I think I managed to beat her by 3 burpees. Good job motivating me coach, now I have to go change my underwear.

Oh man, then there was Friday. I was heading to Oahu for work that day on a 9 a.m. flight and wasn't coming back until Sunday. I'm trying to be good about the workout thing so I go to the 6 a.m. class.

I tell you, the people who go to this class have my respect. Nothing is working on your body that early. Your eyes aren't fully open, your muscles aren't warmed up and your brain is not functioning right.

Let me put it this way, I put hair gel on my toothbrush that morning. Woof.

And the workout that morning was not a good one for a body not warmed up yet. First deadlifts. I was supposed to end up with 300 pounds but no freaking way. My back was already screaming with 135. 

Yeah, like I said, it was early.

Then it was a barbell complex from hell. Run 200 meters and come back and do THREE rounds of 5 power cleans, 5 squats and 5 push jerks. Then you run another 200 meters and do TWO rounds of that same complex then run your last 200 and do the last round of the complex.

Sound like something you want to do at 6 a.m? HELL NO. But we did it and I couldn't stop sweating afterwards. Even when I was taking an ice cold shower at the gym I could tell I was STILL sweating while in the shower. 

How do you sweat while the water is ice cold? When you have a frickin crazy barbell complex WOD first thing in the morning, that's how.

Damn. But I'm glad I did it because I can always enjoy my weekend better with a good Friday workout. 

Anyway, that brings us up to date with today's workout. "The Chief."

Five rounds of AMRAP of 3 power cleans, 6 push-ups and 9 squats. Three minutes for each round and a minute rest in between.

That's a long ass workout. And then I realize that I have to use 70 percent of my 1 rep max for power cleans, which for me is 135 pounds.

Ah crap. But then I look around and Marcus, Ikaika and Bruce are throwing on the 45 pound bumper plates too. I'm in good company.

So we start and after the first round is over it is apparent what is going to be the problem. I look over to Ikaika during the rest and he tells me he's "starting to feel those squats."

Yeah, the 9 air squats are slowing everyone down. Me more than most.

But we all keep up a good pace, amazing how having that minute rest period helps your lungs and muscles out. I started each round feeling sorta fresh. 

By the fifth round I tore off my shirt and kicked off my slippers (yeah, forgot the shoes today) and went for it. But those squats still slowed me down. I think I had 14 rounds. 

Whatever. Everybody felt pretty good after the workout and was talking about how much they liked it. 

Figures. Give RFM members a minute rest between WOD rounds and we act like it's a special treat. 

Works for me. See you guys tomorrow.

Later,

Rod